The Fat Man is Coming

Thought I was talking about this guy right?

Nope.

I was talking about YOU.

Halloween just got done, Thanksgiving is in a couple of weeks and Christmas and New Years are right after that.

Wha this time of year is a really good opportunity to get fat…and quick.

Dose of stark reality, unless you’re a glutton during this entire stretch (which I understand because I can be) you shouldn’t gain more than 5 pounds….and honestly that’s pushing it.

People always say, “I gained 10 pounds” last year…and that’s complete crap.

Most people gain between 1-4 pounds but “feel” fat because they are bloated from the sodium and carbs.

That said, excuses to eat like a Fat Bastard and skip the gym abound.

There is awesome food everywhere.

You have to go shopping, go to parties, watch football games, travel, watch football games, and shop some more..

I mean, you can’t go to the gym…You don’t have time.

You need to wait in line for 8 hours outside of Wal-Mart in the freezing cold after eating to the point of stomach distention.

Never mind that you might get into a fist fight or trampled.

It’s worth it to save $100 bucks on a 75 inch tv and mini, 5 speed adjustable, blender….

It’s the thrill of the hunt.

From my perspective here’s some basic realities about this season:

1) You’ll Eat a Lot More Crap Than you Normally Do.

This could be ok:

If you’re trying to gain mass and have a naturally fast metabolism eating all the crap in sight might be a good thing especially if you’re a pretty skinny guy.

Skinny guys trying to gain weight always go,“I’m eating a lot”.

What they mean is, “I normally eat like a small bird”, I’m now eating like a like that plus I have a Banana and a protein bar…….sometimes.

The extra calories could be helpful for these people.

If you’re fairly lean and muscular (usually 10% body fat and under) and have been restricting your diet for a while, as long as you keep training, this period of increased calories, combined with your insulin sensitivity could lead to a surge in muscle.

For these people their body has grown so accustomed to “doing with less” that when they have an excess in calories for a time there is a good chance that the body will store carbs as glycogen and use the fats and proteins as building blocks for muscle growth.

This could be bad: and usually is.

If you eat everything in sight you WILL gain weight.

If it’s crap, especially in the presence of alcohol, you’ll gain fat, …plain and simple.

If you’re skipping workouts it WILL be stored as fat.

If you train hard bad nutrition WILL impair your recovery.

If you’re athletic and have been training for a while yet are not very lean (“athletic” males are at about 9-15% body fat) but cookies, cakes and eggnog replace your normally good diet you’ll “crowed out” the nutrients that are needed to repair and recover the body from hard training.

This will quickly lead to impaired performance.

Bottom line: For most people, holiday eating is very,very bad for their fitness/weight goals.

I’m not gonna tell you not to eat any of it.

Or that you should bring a bag of baby carrots to a party so you have a “healthy snack”.

Eat this:

Not This:

That’s stupid and I’m sure as hell not doing that.

That said, have some balls, man up and don’t make excuses for yourself.

You don’t have to be a glutton, you choose to be.

Give some things priorities, if you’re gonna eat the extra piece of cake, skip the rolls at dinner.

If you know your going to be eating the farm try to keep the alcohol to a minimum.

Alcohol and extra calories are like a fat making factory, if you’re drinking try not to be a glutton too.

Maybe try not to eat anything “bad” between meals.

If you’re having dessert, have dessert and a lot of it, but don’t snack on the leftovers throughout the night/ next day restrict them to certain times.

Maybe don’t bring anything home.

Have it while you’re at the event and leave the leftovers there, if it’s not in your house you won’t eat it.

2) You’ll Miss Gym Sessions: or the “Occupy” the Gym segment of our broadcast

This could be ok: or the 1%

If you train a lot, all year, and grind your body into a pulp missing sessions could be a good thing.

Think of it as an unplanned deload.

If you’re this dedicated to training you’ll still be getting to the gym regularly so you definitely won’t experience much of a detraining effect if any at all.

In fact, you’ll get an extra day off here and there and/ or some abbreviated sessions which will allow for some much-needed rest and recovery from a year of SFW….smashing f-ing weights.

You’re muscles, ligaments, tendons and nervous system will thank you.

This could be bad: or the 99%

You’re gonna make excuses and you’re not going to be here.

Your gonna miss gym sessions like Shaq misses free throws…..

How do I know this?

I work in a gym.

I actually like it this time of year…. place is empty, It’s great….thanks.

While my clients are great about showing up, if you’re not paying me, I know you’re not showing up.

You’ve found another ~~reason~~ excuse to bail….again.

It’s cool, you got a great deal on the Once ~~this Week~~ in a Lifetime Sale at Kohls…I get it.

Here’s the thing, when we miss workouts we lose “fitness level”. Mostly aerobic at first but miss enough, you may start to lose muscle mass, couple that with a crappy diet…

You WILL lose muscle mass and you WILL gain fat.

Bottom Line: You’ll be totally puffy, bloated and pissed January 2nd.

Don’t waste the effort you’ve already put out.

Make a schedule and stick to it.

If that means cutting back on the gym one day a week, cut back one day.

If it means shorter workouts, have shorter workouts.

Cut out the “fluff” and stick with the big, compound lifts.

For a better “fat burning” workout create “metabolic circuits“. Non-competing exercises done with little rest in between.

Just don’t blow your workouts off altogether…get something in…….something is always better than nothing.

Remember, once you miss a workout it becomes easier to justify missing the next, then the one after that and so on….

If you can limit your gluttony and still get to the gym, I’m guessing your holiday weight gain will be between nothing and a couple of pounds

…….tops.